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Saturday, October 28, 2006
The Adventures of a Beer Salesman - 1st Day on the Job
Short story by Johnny Wolverine, from Michigan Stadium
It started January 31st, 2005 on a blusterly cold first day on the job. It was spitting ice crystals that would jam in the corners of your eyes irritating your mind enough to wish upon a Chinese water torture instead. Twelve new recruits starting on this day that in their minds was the beginning of a glamourous, fun-filled opportunity. The office was in a state of confusion that morning at 8:07 A.M. The twelve new recruits stood there staring at each other like the contestants of a new reality TV show.
We were all wondering if our presence was felt in the room or was this just the realism of how out of touch this company was? We stood there for what seemed like a full eight hour work day. Finally, I got teamed up with the person that would show me the ropes, but first I must fill out the proper paperwork. I have always said your first day on the job always seems as long as your last day of school, you know like the clock was moving backwards against time.
The time was now 10:39 A.M. and we were heading out. The roads were just now looking passable so maybe taking all that time was not so bad after all. I was dressed for a Supermarket route and got stuck on Drive Thru duty. The elements outside were better than inside the freezing coolers of a Drive Thru, but that was where the orders would be taken. I was wondering what it would take to sell beer on such a day like this when I was thinking whiskey myself.
After a long cold day and ten stops we could only muster up a 32 case order. What had I gotten myself into? How can you make a living off of this? It is hard to justify you did the right thing when you start on a day like this in the beverage industry. Where was all the luster and fun that I was told about? Frank told me, "this is the Midwest, it is the slow time of the year" he assured me of this, "St. Patrick's day is on its way and you will get your first look at some excitement." "I am patient Frank," I told him. Let the green beer countdown begin.
It started January 31st, 2005 on a blusterly cold first day on the job. It was spitting ice crystals that would jam in the corners of your eyes irritating your mind enough to wish upon a Chinese water torture instead. Twelve new recruits starting on this day that in their minds was the beginning of a glamourous, fun-filled opportunity. The office was in a state of confusion that morning at 8:07 A.M. The twelve new recruits stood there staring at each other like the contestants of a new reality TV show.
We were all wondering if our presence was felt in the room or was this just the realism of how out of touch this company was? We stood there for what seemed like a full eight hour work day. Finally, I got teamed up with the person that would show me the ropes, but first I must fill out the proper paperwork. I have always said your first day on the job always seems as long as your last day of school, you know like the clock was moving backwards against time.
The time was now 10:39 A.M. and we were heading out. The roads were just now looking passable so maybe taking all that time was not so bad after all. I was dressed for a Supermarket route and got stuck on Drive Thru duty. The elements outside were better than inside the freezing coolers of a Drive Thru, but that was where the orders would be taken. I was wondering what it would take to sell beer on such a day like this when I was thinking whiskey myself.
After a long cold day and ten stops we could only muster up a 32 case order. What had I gotten myself into? How can you make a living off of this? It is hard to justify you did the right thing when you start on a day like this in the beverage industry. Where was all the luster and fun that I was told about? Frank told me, "this is the Midwest, it is the slow time of the year" he assured me of this, "St. Patrick's day is on its way and you will get your first look at some excitement." "I am patient Frank," I told him. Let the green beer countdown begin.
